How being a Do-It-Yourself Mom has changed my life

do it yourself, mom, life changing

9 YEAR OLD: “I need my laundry done for tomorrow”

ME: “Do it yourself.”

5 YEAR OLD: “Can you get me a snack?”

ME: “Do it yourself.”

2 YEAR OLD: “I need my shoes put on.”

ME: “Do it yourself.”

BABY: “I need my diaper changed.”

ME: “Do it yourself.”


Alright, alright. The last one is a little far fetched (although I can’t say I haven’t tried getting her to change her own diaper). In reality my kids are pretty independent. This is for a couple reasons:

  1. Instilling independence in children at a young age will encourage them to be individual thinkers, confident people, and self-sufficient.
  2. I don’t have time, energy, or patience to do everything for everybody.

There’s enough on my plate. My duties as a Mom take up a big chunk of my day; including, but not limited to: driving kids to school, playing with my toddler, feeding my baby, cleaning feces off floors (ya……), booking appointments and making dinner. These are just some of my duties as a Mom. This doesn’t include the things I need to do to take care of myself, like eating, showering, and spending quality time by myself–which are just as important, Mama!

You MUST delegate tasks. There’s way too much pressure for one ol’ person–if you don’t relieve some of that pressure you’re bound to blow!

I’m certainly not suggesting that you get your toddler to scrub toilets (she wouldn’t do it properly anyway, probably), but giving your kids age appropriate chores fosters their desire for independence, while giving you a break on what you need to accomplish. Alright, well, in some cases, like the toddler doing laundry, you’re mostly allowing them to have the satisfaction of helping because their help actually makes your job a little harder…but their sense of independence is important, too!

But, HOW is this done???

Kids aren’t exactly eager to finish chores, even those specific to their ages. Would you happily do all your daily duties if there wasn’t promise of a glass of wine and some #Netflixandchill time at the end of the day? I probably would not.

I use bribery, or, as some would say “incentive”. For example: my kids get their t.v. time from 5:00 until 6:00. That’s when I’m making dinner and I need my hangry, unreasonable children out of my hair so I can burn their food in peace. I let them know when it’s 4:00 and tell them the chores that they’re expected to do. They have one hour from that warning to get their chores done. It shouldn’t take them an hour to do what they need to do, but, kids. If they dilly dally they end up going over into their t.v. time. If they do what they need to do they can relax and watch a show! Mom’s happy and everyone wins!

Everyone has their own way of encouraging their kids to do chores. What are yours?


  1. Sirri

    I laughed out loud!! Diaper ” do it yourself ” Hahaha! Thank you for the love!! ❤❤❤

    1. Admin (Post author)

      I wish, eh?! I think teaching her to do it herself may be my new challenge!

  2. Debra

    I told all my friends that my girls would be making their beds by the time they were 3. They laughed. You girls made your beds by the time you were 3! Helping with chores never hurts and it’s part of being a family. Keep encouraging!

    1. Admin (Post author)

      Ya, except we don’t make our beds now!

  3. Cassie

    I have a 6 yr old who is the baby of the family and who spasmatically will switch from “No I can do it myself” to “Mommy can you feed me!” Uggh! Love the post!!

    1. Admin (Post author)

      Kids! I seriously can’t understand them…

  4. Shirley Corder

    Great post, and completely correct . . . maybe apart from the diaper change. 🙂

    1. Admin (Post author)

      Haha, but at least I tried, right?

  5. Nicky Nelson

    My kids are pretty much ‘grown up’ now with the exception of the 16 yr old. They have all been brought up to do things for themselves but I have to admit, the energy levels waned somewhat by the 3rd meaning the most independent child is the first!!

    1. Admin (Post author)

      I have to agree with you. I try and instill it in my 6 and 3 year old, but they’re not catching on the same way my oldest did.

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