How to avoid your toddler’s tantrum

No more tantruming toddlers

Dealing with a tantruming toddler is as high on my list of favorite things to do as my PAP smear is. Not a good time. At all.

Due to the unpredictable nature of these feisty little people it’s not always easy to avoid a flailing meltdown (theirs, not yours). As parents we work very hard to make sure we are dealing with our toddlers as effectively as possible, especially when they’re mid-tantrum.

Sometimes, however, exhaustion gets the better of us and we will do ANYTHING we can to avoid taking a Dr.Iknoweverythingaboutkidsbutdontactuallyhaveany’s approach to emotional outbursts (theirs, not yours). As soon as we detect the smallest indication that our precious angel is about to let loose we take the following steps to ensure we don’t have to deal with a full fledged tantrum:

 

Get in your zone.

You’re gonna need to mentally prepare for this. Fight your parental instincts of proper discipline. Remember, this is for your sanity.

Open a bottle of wine.

It’s not easy to avoid a toddler’s psychotic state of tantrum, so if you’re unsuccessful in your attempts at least you’ll be ready. Take this quiz to find out which wine will suit you best.

Oppose nothing.

Your toddler wants you to jump up and down? You jump. Your toddler wants you to be a “poo head”? You’re a poo head. Arguing will get you nowhere. You are now their bitch.

Your toddler owns you

Declare defeat.

Straight up tell your toddler that they’ve won. They can smell fear. They already KNOW they’ve won, but they want to hear it straight from you.

Look away from their eyes.

Do not engage in eye contact. A hostile toddler will take this as a sign of aggression. You’re trying to avoid a throwdown, not instigate one.

Utilize every strategy you know.

Pull out the candy. Turn on the Paw Patrol. Buy them a puppy. Do whatever you have to do to avoid an impending toddler outburst.

Corral backup

No matter what you do it may be wrong according to your toddler. Have a back-up team of at least 8. In theory, at least one person should be able to come up with something to keep them happy.

Kiss your pride bye-bye

Understand that you have lost the battle to a tiny dictator. Own it.  Don’t worry, there’s a lot of us.

 

Following this simple G.O.O.D.L.U.C.K. strategy should lead you to be successful in your efforts to avoid a toddler tantrum.

If you find that your efforts were futile, and you are head on with an hysterical toddler, make sure to some research into the first of these parenting articles you’ll want to read. This one thing may be the answer to your problems.

Good luck to you, good people.

28 Comments

  1. Paige

    I’m confused. I’m not a parent, so fill me in here if I’m sounding wrong. Wouldn’t giving candy and buying puppies reinforce to a toddler that hinting at negative behavior is a good thing? What’s your take?

    Reply
    1. Samantha Palmer (Post author)

      I understand your confusion. This certainly isn’t intended to be a serious parenting tip:) Sometimes it’s nice to revel in how you COULD deal with a situation rather than how you WOULD deal with a situation.

      Reply
  2. Amanda

    That certainly is a novel way to handle an impending tantrum. It is always interesting, and sometimes entertaining to read how other parents handle this situation.

    Reply
    1. Samantha Palmer (Post author)

      I can’t say it’s how I always avoid a tantrum…but there are times when giving in would be a nice option!

      Reply
  3. Casey

    Love your humor about this very frustrating phenomenon….and I too think pairing a good wine with the situation is a must!

    Reply
    1. Samantha Palmer (Post author)

      Definitely! Sometimes it’s the means to sanity!

      Reply
  4. Kira

    Thanks for a laugh this morning! My little one is just shy of 18 months and I know the tantrums are just started. I will start stocking up on wine 😉

    Reply
    1. Samantha Palmer (Post author)

      Very wise idea, Mama!

      Reply
  5. jehava

    LOL love this list!! SO my life right now.

    Reply
    1. Samantha Palmer (Post author)

      You’re not alone. Stay strong, Mama!

      Reply
  6. Kate

    Bahahaha, love this. I like to pair step D (declare defeat) with laying on the floor, just to further emphasize the point that they win, I give up, I’m too freaking tired for these tantrums today.
    🙂

    Reply
    1. Samantha Palmer (Post author)

      Absolutely! They may not understand (care) what you’re doing, but it would sure make you feel better:)

      Reply
  7. Sade Lee

    Thanks for the laugh, any parent who has been in these moments will totally relate. I’m there right now. This morning my almost 3 year old has a 20 minute meltdown because he could only have 1 chocolate from the advent calendar. If he could of had his way he would of eaten up till Christmas before 7am. Brilliant post!

    Reply
    1. Samantha Palmer (Post author)

      Ooooh before 7:( You’re a tough lady to get out of that one! Stay strong, Mama!

      Reply
  8. Ashley | Spit Up and Sit Ups

    I’m on board with the wine!

    Reply
    1. Samantha Palmer (Post author)

      Cheers!

      Reply
  9. Chloe

    Haha I love your look on toddler tantrums. Wine is always necessary. And headphones if it gets really out of control.

    (Just joking in case anyone takes me seriously) (Not joking about the wine though haha)

    Reply
    1. Samantha Palmer (Post author)

      Headphones are a great idea!! Really, it’s the best of both worlds; you know they’re still safe but you don’t have to hear about how terrible it is that you let them wear the dress they want to wear (yes, that’s been a topic of tantrum in this house…).

      Reply
  10. suzanne

    Haha. We are right in the middle of this with my 2 year old, and OMG. Yes to all of the above 🙂

    Reply
    1. Samantha Palmer (Post author)

      I can’t even believe how much control these little people have over our level of sanity! Take it easy, Mama!

      Reply
  11. Rocio Chavez

    Lol so true. While I only have nieces and nephews I’ve seen it all and have even gotten some of their wrath – cray cray, but fun all the same 😀

    Reply
    1. Samantha Palmer (Post author)

      For sure. It’s definitely a good time…but sometimes it can be unbelievably frustrating!

      Reply
  12. Janine

    Witty article! Love this haha!

    Reply
    1. Samantha Palmer (Post author)

      Thank you!

      Reply
  13. val

    I’m really surprised some people didn’t catch your sarcasm here but I totally get it and it made me LOL.
    Good luck and godspeed parents of toddlers 😉

    Reply
    1. Samantha Palmer (Post author)

      I’m glad you enjoyed it:)

      Reply
  14. brittany

    Girl I feel you…mommin’ aint easy…especially with a toddler hahaha

    Reply
    1. Samantha Palmer (Post author)

      Absolutely!

      Reply

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